C-rats

A couple days back, Trish was preparing and freezing food for our upcoming Lake Powell houseboat trip; pound cake is one of several items on the menu.  When I asked her what she was baking, and heard 'pound cake,' I had a flashback.  Vietnam: pound cake was the most coveted item in the C-rat meals field soldiers lived on, and the competition to score that precious commodity was fierce.  C-rats (combat rations) came in cases of 12 individual boxes.  Each meal was different, and only 1 included pound cake.

My first assignment in Nam had me in a rat cage, an underground bunker on the DMZ. There was no electricity, no plumbing, no anything even vaguely associated with civilization as we know it.  Sustenance consisted of tepid, tinny-tasting water stored in jerrycans and, of course, C-rats.  Every day.  Every breakfast.  Every lunch.  Every dinner.  Friggin' C-rats!*

The larger army bases where I spent the last few months of my 1-year 'tour' had mess halls and the chow was quite good.  However, I didn't spend much time in base camps, was out in the jungle more often than not, and (Whoopee!) living on C-rats.  C-rats weighed in at 1.5 pounds each, could only carry 3-4 days worth because you also had to carry 2-4 canteens of water, rifle, ammo, sleeping gear, personal items, etc.  Humping half your body weight up steamy jungle mountains burned lots of calories, had to consume lots and lots of good 'ol C-rats.

Typical C-rat meal.  

The coffee made you gag but instant chocolate was drinkable.

Towards the end of my 12-month 'tour' in Nam, we occasionally got the new version of army haute cuisine: LRPs (Long Range Patrol Rations, later called MREs, Meals Ready to Eat).  These were freeze-dried, one-course meals in heavy duty, shrink-wrapped plastic bags.  They were better - and much lighter - than C-rats, but you had to heat water to boiling, pour it into the bag and stir for a few minutes before you could eat, took too darn long.  And, if out in the jungle on search and destroy missions, you had to carry more water, and Sterno or some other fuel; C4 plastic explosive was best, burned really hot, but hard to come by.

LRRPs (pronounced lurps) 

On the flip side of pound cake was ham and lima beans, the least favorite of all C-rats.  Soldiers often swapped food items, and on rare occasions you might find someone who actually liked ham and limas.  "Hey Joe, wanna swap your pound cake for my ham and lima beans?"  Joe: "Up yours!"

Something the dog left behind?  Fake barf?

Nope: ham and lima beans!

Winner, Most Repulsive Food Ever Contest.

Tobasco was my salvation, as it was for many others.  I might leave my flak jacket behind but never the Tobasco sauce.

*There was one memorable exception: on Thanksgiving day, a chopper dropped off a hot, delicious turkey dinner packed in insulated containers.  My 2 fellow advisors and I really packed it in that day.