Quail

Quail are the most abundant bird species in these parts. They’re all over the place and you hear their chirps all day every day, a very pleasant form of background music. Come sundown they all fly up into the trees to roost, safe from marauding coyotes.

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Trish read up on quail, learned that they post a sentry on a high point like a fence or rock to sound an alarm if there’s danger to the covey as they forage for seeds on the ground. This raises all sorts of questions in my ever-curious mind:

1. Who appoints the sentry?

2. Is there a covey committee or birdie board that decides whose turn it is to pull duty, how long the shifts last and so on? If so, are the committee/board members elected? How often are elections held, who is eligible to vote, are there term limits?

3. Could be that birds have benevolent dictatorships rather than democracies; in what manner then is the head bird determined?

4. Maybe it’s a just a volunteer position and after a few hours the on-duty bird cheeps the message, “Hey, I’m starving here! It’s time for a new sentry. Dan, get your fat ass over here!”

5. What if Dan responds with, “Pluck you, Quentin. I just found a really good mess of seeds, my favorites, gonna snarf ‘em up.” Who does Quentin complain to? Is there a grievance committee? A union?

6. Is this a males-only position or do females pull guard duty also?

7. May gay birds be guards if they don’t ask and don’t tell?

8. If the sentry falls asleep and a cat nails one of the grazing birds, is the guilty birdie punished? In what manner?

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Does anyone out there speak Quail?