Lizards, Reptiles and Amphibians

We watched a Geico commercial awhile back, a guy in a laboratory being consumed by a green glob of gunk.  Stupid, blah, yuk!  "I liked the lizard better." said I. "Geckos aren't lizards," Trish responded. Googled it: yup, they're lizards alright.  That got me wondering about the lizard family: who's included, who isn't, are the marine iguanas I saw in the Galapagos Islands lizards or amphibians? Here's the skinny, lizard lovers, amazing facts and statistics you always wanted to know but never realized until just now.

Geckos are the smallest of the lizards, which are a subset of the reptile family.  The largest lizard is the Komodo dragon which can weigh up to 300 pounds and reach 10' in length.  They're carnivores, are very quick and they do consume the occasional human, bones and all.  Grabbing one by the tail isn't really a good idea.

This might surprise you: modern scientists include birds in the reptile family.  When we visited Dinosaur National Monument last year, one of the rangers said, "Birds are dinosaurs."  Golly gee, Mister Science!

If you're cold-blooded, have overlapping scales and are not a snake, you're a lizard.  If you're a  cold-blooded vertebrate with dry, scaly skin and lay soft shelled eggs on land you're a reptile.  If you have both lungs and gills - like frogs, newts, turtles and salamanders - you're an amphibian.

Marine iguanas aren't amphibians but can stay underwater for up to 45 minutes, chowing down on algae, their favorite food.  Although not very photogenic, they love to pose for pictures, big grins on their faces.

Stylin'!

My recent attempt to inspire a new trend in Arizona footwear was unsuccessful.  Not a single one of my friends had the intestinal fortitude to follow in my avant garde, ground-breaking, sartorial footsteps.  What a bunch of wussies!

A few days ago I drove down to Casa Grande, met up with fraternity brother Tom, then headed on down to the Tucson area to visit Al, another fraternity brother.  I left LHC at 7:30 AM, freshly showered and shaved.  Stopped twice en route to CG for bladder breaks and a burger, arrived at Tom's shortly after noon.  We chatted awhile, had a brew and then I headed off to the guest bedroom for my daily nap.

I sat down on a chair and bent down to remove my sandals - and was flabbergasted at what I saw!  My right foot was encased in Keens, my left foot in one of the cheap-ass knockoffs I wear around home.  I laughed out loud.  Couldn't believe I'd left home without noticing that.  Couldn't believe I'd stopped twice and hadn't noticed.  Couldn't believe Trish hadn't noticed either.

After my nap, sandals back on my feet, I showed them to Tom and his wife, Martha.  They hadn't noticed the mismatch earlier, were quite delighted when I pointed it out.  And, later, so was Al.  We went out to dinner at Al's and again when Tom and I returned to CG.  My attempts to have everyone wear mismatched footwear out to dinner fell on deaf ears.  Guess they just aren't ready to embrace that level of senility.  I'm confident they will embrace it in due time, although, given my commanding lead, it's doubtful they'll ever catch up.

Strike 3

When we bought our LHC home, there was a tree living in a raised bed near the front entry, stood about 6' tall.  "What kind of tree was it?" you ask.  Not sure but quite likely a Ho-Humia Nondescriptus.  Borrrrring!  Certainly didn't merit a focal point position in front of the house.  Took one look at it and thought you're sooo outta here!  And so it came to pass.

Now then, what to replace it with?  An orange tree of course!  Citrus does well in Arizona if provided with adequate water and fertilizer, and I'm an excellent provider thereof if I do say so myself (especially fertilizer).  The orange tree flourished, beau coup oranges 3 years after planting.  But, nary a one fit to eat - all pulp, no juice. Turns out the variety I selected was racist, wouldn't consider cross-pollination in its wildest dreams.  So, it too bit the dust.

Okay, what next?  Hours of arduous research spent finding a plant of the right size and temperament resulted in the next selection, a pygmy date palm.  My neighbors have several, 5-6' tall, attractive (picture below), seemed like a no-brainer.  Bought one, stuck it in the ground, gave it lots of TLC.  To no avail: darn thing just sat there, never grew an inch.  Strike 3!  You're out!  Enough, already!  No more plants!*  How about colorful glazed pottery? 

I ripped out the palm and tossed it over the back fence to RIP with its predecessors.  Then I capped off the irrigation pipe to the planter and off we went in search of pottery.  We didn't find much, LHC not being the Mecca of fine yard art.  Trish was headed off to Santa Fe in a few weeks, and we knew she'd find a better selection there.  And indeed she did, bought a tall pot and a sphere.  We wanted a group of 3, found the third one at the local Lowe's.

So, here's the new look.  The gabion cube was a bonus.  When I ordered the parts for the mailbox, they screwed up, sent 6 extra 2X2 panels, so might as well put them to use.  I made the copper trellis several years ago, brought it from OR.  That thing on the far right in the picture below is a rain chain, much more attractive than a plain downspout.

*No more plants in just that one spot, still have 8 types of cacti and a century plant in other areas.