Saturday, November 25, 2017

Tempe, AZ

Tempe's Desert Botanical Garden gets my vote for best of breed in desert-themed public gardens.  It was started in 1939, covers 140 acres, and has 55K desert plants from all over the world. The pix below was taken at the entrance, a living mosaic of little cacti.



Also near the entrance are the glass sculptures pictured below - by none other than the famous glass artist, Dale Chihuly.


We're in Tempe for Thanksgiving, hosted by fraternity brother Al and his main squeeze, Jan.  We alternate hosting the event, so it's our turn next year. 

The following pix include several large ceramic heads by Jun Kaneko,a famous artist I'd never heard of before.  I don't get out much.









Little woman, BIG cacti!


Above and below, sitting on the edges of the walkway, those tan rectangular things are luminaries.  There are 8,000 of them in the Gardens, each with its own wax candle.  On Las Noches de las Luminarias, all those candles get fired up.  Super speedy sprinters compete for the honor of lighting the candles.  The winner has 30 minutes to light all 8K candles.  If he fails, leaves any single candle unlit, he's tarred and feathered, and then thrown into the Salt River.

Obviously, I'm clueless on the candle lighting.  Was curious about it but couldn't find anything on the website.  Gotta take hundreds of people. 


Kaneko also did the critters below, calls them raccoon-dogs.  Raccoon-dogs? I don't think so.  How about pig-bears?



Tempe, population 182K, is the home of Arizona State University, the largest public university in the US, with 72,000 enrollment.  The Phoenix area has 5 campuses and there are 4 regional campuses, including the newest one in Lake Havasu City, my home town, started in 2012.


Wednesday, November 15, 2017

Something to Cry About

"Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about!"  Is there anyone who hasn't heard that one?  I surely did.  Here are some more sayings from my childhood.

Between male siblings:
"Did you fall in?"  Shouted through closed bathroom door.
"Should I throw you a rope?"  Ditto.  (1 bathroom, 8 people.)
"Nice play, Shakespeare!"  Any screw up.
"NSDT"  (No shit, Dick Tracy)  Stating the painfully obvious.
"You're cruisin' for a bruisin.'"  Oops, too much smart mouth.
"Your voice is changing but your breath smells the same."  Fart.
"Useless as tits on a boar."  Didn't do it right - or not at all.
"Gag a maggot."  Nasty food, smell, whatever.
"Puke a snake."  Ditto
"Your barn door's open."  Unzipped fly.


From Mom to us kids:
"You're a naughty piece of cheese."  When being mischievous.  Never heard that one anywhere else, no google results.  Huh?
"You're gonna have a lot to answer for."  You did something bad and your purgatory time just got extended.  Again.  Oh, well.
"Kids in China are starving."  Okay, ship it over there, I hate it.
"What's the rating?"  Couldn't watch any movie not approved for kids by the Catholic church. 
"Go wash your mouth out with soap."  Said a bad word.  Yuk! 
"If it was a snake, it'd bite you."  Look again, dummy.
"Go soak your head."  Actually did that once.  Didn't help.
"You could grow potatoes in there."  Dirty ears en route to church, followed by spit bath.  Ew!

From Dad to us kids:
"Are you cracked?"  Did something stupid.  
"I said so.  That's why!"  No explanation needed. 
"Sit there and be quiet."  He invented 'time outs.' 
"Were you born in a barn?"  Left the door open.

Personal favorites I still use occasionally: 
"People in hell want ice water."
"Go suck an egg."
"We went to different high schools together."
"10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag."

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Frisbee Golf

When we were in Grand Junction, CO, we took the dogs to a large off-leash park in nearby Palisade.  The park has a Frisbee golf course, and there was a state tournament in progress, dozens of 4-person teams.  We'd seen a few of these courses in our travels but rarely saw people playing the game, had no idea it was such a big deal.  A state tournament?  Really?  Who knew?


The players were mostly 30-ish guys, each with 20+ discs stuffed into a rectangular duffel bag mounted on a miniature refer dolly.  We chatted up one of the foursomes and hung with them for awhile, got a little education.  One team member, tall guy, nailed a hole in one from about 500'.  Unbelievable!  He had us sign his Frisbee, as witnesses.  Holes in one are as rare as they are in regular golf; the guy was ecstatic.



The discs have various weights and are labeled like golf clubs: driver, midrange, putter, etc.  The player stands on the concrete tee-off pad, eyeballs the course and obstacles - there were lots of trees in the park - selects the appropriate disc, does whatever style of approach he/she has developed, and wings it down range hoping to miss all the trees and get within putting distance of the goal.

There are over 5K courses in the USA, and it's played in 31 other countries also.  There's even enough prize money in the larger tournaments to generate a few professionals.  I've used the term 'team' above but I think it's the individual's score that counts; I suspect the foursomes are put together in a random manner.

Tuesday, October 10, 2017

Frostbite Falls

Most readers of my vintage know that Frostbite Falls is the name of a fictitious town in northern Minnesota.  It was the hometown of TV cartoon characters Rocky and Bullwinkle.  That's them below; some of the other main characters are pictured also. 


Having grown up in northern MN myself and surviving (barely) its frigid winters, I find the name appropriate as well as humorous.  I left MN at the earliest opportunity but still take a wicked delight in namedropping FF with family and friends who still live there.

Dudley Do-Right

Recently, I stumbled onto the history of the name, found it intriguing.  The creator of the series, Jay Ward, lived in Berkeley, CA, but for some reason became a great fan of the Golden Gophers from the University of Minnesota.  His favorite Gopher was Bronko Nagurski, a star football player who hailed from International Falls, MN.  I-Falls was sometimes called 'The Icebox of the Nation' owing to its dubious honor of frequently having the lowest temps in the country.  That tickled Jay apparently, inspired him to come up with the FF name.


Snidely Whiplash

The cartoon series was at once both silly and delightfully clever.  Puns ran rampant.  I loved it.


Boris Badenov and Natasha Fatale

In 2000 a Rocky and Bullwinkle movie was released.  Despite having major star power (Rene Russo, Robert DeNiro, Randy Quaid, John Goodman, et al) viewers weren't impressed.  They preferred the cartoon characters.

Sunday, October 1, 2017

Duct Tape

Ever heard the Duct Tape song?  No?  It's a must-listen.

Actually, there are several duct tape songs.  I've only listened to a few but this one stands head and shoulders above the others: the Duct Tape Madrigal in C Major.

Here you go:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmaBPAldQEE

If this little ditty doesn't make you smile, better call the undertaker, "He's dead, Jim."

Friday, September 29, 2017

Hotshots

Hotshot: a talented and successful person : someone who is successful or skillful in a showy or flashy way.

One rarely hears the word used that way anymore.  Nowadays, hotshots are men and women who fight wildfires, either full time or seasonally.

On the Burning Edge, authored by Kyle Dickman, himself a one-time hotshot, is a book that tells the story of the Yarnell Hill wildfire and the men who fought it.  Yarnell is a small AZ town, about 50 miles southwest of Prescott.  The book was a random pick from the Arizona section of the LHC public library - an excellent choice as it turned out.  I was especially intrigued by the story because of my own brush with wildfires when I worked for the Forest Service in the mid 60s.  More on that later.

The Granite Mountain hotshots, based in Prescott, AZ, consisted of 2 10-man crews.  Several were veterans who had served in Afghanistan and Iraq.  In 2013, when the story takes place, most of the men had already spent a few seasons fighting fires, although a few were newbies who had recently completed the grueling training required of all would-be hotshots.

Granite Mountain had proven themselves in several wildfires around the country, and were well respected for their ability to get the job done.  The job was mostly building fire lines to contain the blazes, setting backfires, and so on.  Their arsenal included chain saws, pulaskis, axes, shovels.  And sweat.  Lots and lots of sweat.  Despite their training and experience, 19 Granite Mountain men were killed in the Yarnell Hill wildfire - the worst wildfire fighter disaster in 80 years.  Miscommunication and freakish, constantly-changing, 50+ mph winds were mostly to blame for the tragic loss.

The movie Only the Brave will be released in theaters next month.  It tells the story of  the Yarnell Hill wildfire, and the Granite Mountain crews


In the Forest Service, I was engaged in blister rust control, but was also trained to build fire line and do mop up work after a wildfire was contained.  We, mostly college students from all over the country, prayed for wildfires because they meant more money.  You got bonus pay - hazardous duty or per diem or whatever - and you worked long hours.

In late July, 1964, we were rousted at 3 AM to fight a fire in the 7 Devils wilderness of northern Idaho.  We were bused from Pierce, ID to Orofino, ID, where we boarded a DC3.  We were in the air about 45 minutes when the plane made a U-turn: turned out we weren't needed after all.

The following summer, I was promoted to crew chief.  In early August, my crew and I (9 of us) were trucked to a remote location where a lightning strike had started a small fire on a hilltop where timber had been harvested several years prior.  We packed in 3 miles, carrying food and water for 2 days, sleeping bags, and the tools of the trade: pulaskis, shovels, axes and jack-off backpack tanks.

As wildfires go, this little blaze didn't amount to much.  It was only about 5 acres, had no tall trees and not that much brush. Still, building the fire line was no picnic.  Nor was the mop up - a dirty, hot, nasty job.  The fire line completed, and all hot spots taken care of, we packed out again after about 36 hours on site.  Our filthy faces would have made Al Jolson proud.  Although my wildfire experience doesn't hold a candle to what today's hotshot crews endure, it gives me an understanding of what they're up against and the deepest respect for these tough, brave men and women who put themselves in harms way, over and over.

Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Nails, Corn and Rocks

A couple days ago I stopped at Lowe's, getting supplies for various honey-do projects.  My list included 4" nails.  When our RV campsite is dirt, we lay a large synthetic rug on the ground, helps keep dirt from getting tracked into the RV.  The rug is very lightweight, has loops at the corners and sides for securing it to the ground so it doesn't blow away; hence the nails.


The nails reminded me of my first introduction to same.  Back in the day, back on the farm, the chores were endless, and we kids were 'volunteered' into the work force early on.  One of my first chores was removing nails from old boards.  And, there were always piles of old, salvaged boards, where they came from I haven't a clue. The nails were bent more often than not.  So, straighten the nail, pound on the tip, use the hammer claw to remove it, straighten it some more, throw it into coffee can.  Exciting stuff!

Another salad-years task was uncovering corn.  Horse-drawn planters and cultivators weren't famous for maintaining a straight line.  Cultivators were, however, famous for burying little corn seedlings.  "Mike, I want you to uncover corn in the field I cultivated yesterday."  Gee, thanks, Dad!  Can't think of anything I'd rather do.  I get my trusty forked stick and off I go, trudging up and down the corn rows all day.  And the next day.  And the next, liberating little plants from premature burial. Talk about tedious.

Picking rocks was another ongoing chore.  Every time a field was plowed, a new crop of rocks appeared - not good for cultivators, harrows, discs, or other machinery.  Hitch up the horses - later, the tractor - to the stone boat. grab shovels, pickaxe, 6' crowbar and off you go.  We had several rock piles scattered around the farm, the largest of which was a good 300' long, 4' high and 12' wide.

Stone boat is a misnomer.  They're not shaped like boats, doubt they even float.  Don't recall ever seeing anyone water ski behind one.  They're crude, sturdy, heavy, constructed of thick oak planks.  Actually they're sleds, not boats.


I'm reminded of an old joke.  This city slicker is driving through Minnesota, stops to stretch his legs beside a field where a farmer is picking rocks.  Mr Slick decides to have a little fun with the farmer, asks him, "Where did all those rocks come from?"

"Glacier brought 'em," the farmer replied.

Slick: "Where's the glacier now?"

Farmer: "Went back for more rocks."